Check Your Self-Control Ability

EACH person needs the freedom to be creative and self actualization. On the other hand, control of the self-regulation is necessary as the instigation and capabilities, whether physical, psychological, and behavioral.

Acting without thinking is a characteristic inherent in children. They acted spontaneously. When sick they will cry anywhere, anytime, and in any situation. When happy, healthy child will run, scribbling, shouting excitedly, or do whatever he wants.

Imagine if this kind of behavior by adolescents or adults. Of course, quite strange. We would feel very disturbed when finding someone who is no longer the children act as they pleased, let impulses or desires that are selfish manifest granted.

The more a person gets older, he expected more and have control over their own behavior. In other words, the more developed the ability to control themselves.

Full / self control (self-control) is the influence or regulation or a person against the physical, behavioral, and psychological processes (Calhoun & Acocella, 1990). It is very important in a person's life. Why?

First, self-control plays a role in one's relationships with others. This is not out of the fact that we do not live alone, but in groups, in the community. In fact, we have personal needs such as food, drink, warmth, and so forth. To meet these needs we need to control yourself in such a way, so as not to disturb others.

Second, self-control plays a role in the achievement of personal goals. Every person, from any culture, always expect to achieve certain goals in life. For example, in order to have a certain competence, achieve personal maturity, and so forth, in accordance with the standards that exist in society.

In order to achieve these objectives we need to learn and try over and over, and control themselves by delaying the gratification of the needs of a moment in order to achieve long-term goals.

By developing the ability to control himself as well as possible, we will become an effective person, so that it can consistently feel happy, free from guilt, to live more constructively, to accept yourself, and also accepted by the community.

Internal and External Control

Increasing age, a person is expected to increasingly develop the ability to control his behavior. Where source control one's behavior? Its source can be divided into two: factors inside and outside one's self.

Control behavior that comes from within themselves are usually referred to as an internal control, and that comes from outside ourselves is called external control. In self-control (internal), individuals regulate their own behavior and performance standards; give reward for himself if successfully achieve the objectives, and to punish himself when not managed to reach the goal.

On the other hand, the external controls, the individual placing another person as a determinant (the cause) of behavior, performance standards, and the rewards gained.

Of the two types of behavior control, personal control (internal) were considered more valuable. Throughout we rely on external control, our lives are largely determined by anyone else. Instead, by developing self-control (internal) means we control two things: ourselves and the world around us.

Self Control Problem

As explained above, self-control a well-developed will provide many benefits to a person. However, in reality, not all self-control we are able to perform consistently.

Our self-control ability varies. There are people who are often too much to drink (until drunk), others too much to eat, others are more easily lose control of emotions, tends to delay the job, and so forth. How can this be happening?

Just as a strong self-control, self-control are weak also develop through the learning process. For example, a teenager who still impulsive, which is always angry when his wish was fulfilled, the possibility of becoming so because since childhood, her parents always comply with all requests (to function as a reward) every time the child was whining to ask anything, even more so when her son was getting angry.

When this kind of reward pattern occurs repeatedly, it means that the child undergo a process of learning that his request would be fulfilled when accompanied by anger. Subsequently he developed a pattern of angry behavior each time his request has not been met.

Someone who has a habit of delaying the work, may become so because from childhood accustomed to working under pressure parents (functioning as a punishment). In such a situation he is motivated to do the task just to avoid punishment. Consequently, in a situation without any pressure, he tends to get lazy.